Problems

“Problems are only opportunities in work clothes.” - Henry J. Kaiser

What would your life be like if all your problems were solved? Take a moment, close your eyes and imagine a truly problem-free existence. Where do you live? How do you live? How do you feel?

Candidly, I’ve never really thought about this deeply before, probably because I was busy trying to solve a problem. However, for some reason, this idea of problems and problem solving is top of mind for me right now.

I’ve come to the conclusion that to live a good life you need to have problems. There is something deeply human about problem-solving, and while we strive to live a problem-free life, this is in fact an unrealistic goal: a problem-free life, like perfection, is unattainable. 

The Myth of Living Problem-Free

The first book I ever read about brain science was “The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat” by Dr. Oliver Sacks. Since then, I’ve read countless books and listened to days’ worth of podcasts on neuroscience. The way our brains work is endlessly fascinating to me. One of the primary functions of the brain is to keep us safe. This is helpful if we are actually in danger, but it can lead us down weird paths and ultimately undermine us when we catastrophize or imagine unlikely worst case scenarios.

Problems are incredibly useful for the brain. Working on a problem keeps your gray matter engaged - figuring out how to get from one place to another, how to approach a business meeting, when to broach a difficult conversation - solving these challenges isn’t simply navigating speed bumps and obstacles, it is the work that keeps us all grounded and well-adjusted. 

Removing problems from your life is actually a recipe for disaster - in the absence of real challenges, your brain will create problems for you.

Embrace Your Problems

Problems are different from crises. If you’ve ever experienced a health crisis or other devastating event, you know the sense of overwhelm and despair these times usher in. When life delivers a crisis, you buckle down and white-knuckle it through. 

Living crisis-free is a blessing, living problem-free is a curse.

My father-in-law shared the following with my husband and me just after the birth of our son: “little kids, little problems; big kids, big problems” - so true!

Raising a child is a joy, but it comes with problems: both banal and unusual, sometimes complex, often hilarious and breathtaking.

Everything comes with a problem set. Solving one set of problems doesn’t eliminate problems, it makes room for new ones.

So, if we are better off with problems, then maybe we should focus less on eradicating problems and more on selecting our problem set.

Your Desired Problem Set

We are approaching the traditional goal-setting, New Year’s resolution time of year. In just about a month, gym memberships will spike, kale will be eaten, and alarm clocks will go off unrealistically early - for about two weeks. 

Instead of focusing solely on goals, what if we focus on “good problems to have”?

What are your current challenges? If you solve these problems, what comes next?

As a financial planner, I have described myself as a problem solver, but I am rethinking this description. In reality, I solve puzzles and help clients upgrade their problems. It’s impossible for me to eliminate problems permanently, but I know I can make them smaller, more manageable, less surprising, better.

We are moving into a new year soon. I wish you all the best during this holiday season.

In 2023, may you find your problems are actually gifts turned inside out.

Kelly